Wednesday, October 13, 2004

Philosophy is Stupid

So a long time ago in Ancient times a bunch of slackers decided that the only thing they could do that was worth their time was to look around and make everyone second guess their own lifestyles and beliefs. Socrates figured out the most ingenius way to fake intelligence was to run around town asking everyone "Why?" five hundred times like a 5 year old little girl making everyone think they were coming to their own conclusions on life. What's even funnier than that to me is that he never really came up with any real answers to anything. He would run around town asking people questions but would secretly be getting off to the fact that he really didn't know anything and people thought he was brilliant. The man never answered a single damn question. Even when the man was on trial for corrupting the youth of the day and becoming a Godless man, the best defense he could come up with was "I know you are, but what am I?" Now a days, I'm stuck in a classroom with a closed minded schmuck of a professor staring at old translations of this guy's life. It begins with a single word like anything I've read, but I've never had to focus on that single word for an hour and fifteen minutes before like I have in this class. My teacher literally stops after every word spoken to discuss what it might mean. Then he gets a stupid grin on his face after the discussion and tells us "Well there is no definitive answer, so you have to figure out what it means for yourself." This wouldn't bother me as much if the man didn't tell some of the students they were flat wrong when they offered a possible answer. This basically confirming my suspicions that my professor has the intelligence of a flaming bag of dog poo. We think way too long and way too hard about these philosophers of the past and their half ass ideas with no conclusions. It's a different day, a different age and I say we focus on the personal truth of our own lives, instead of the universal truth human kind. I've got enough to think about in my own life before I can think about the problems of all mankind. My philosophy on philosophy: Philosophy Blows. If you're going to think that hard about something, make yourself useful and go cure something. By the way, I think Socrates was gay.

56 Comments:

At 7:51 PM, Anonymous GameMiestro said...

Not having a good day, are you?

 
At 5:49 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

NO MIESTRO, THIS GUY/GAL AINT EVER HAD A GOOD DAY LET HIM TELL IT. ITS SO UNCANNY HOW HE MIRRORS IN A OH SO OBVIOUS WAY MOST IF NOT ALL OF WHAT HE SPEWS FORTH /AHHHHHH COMPUTERS AND FREETIME ,VERY HEADY STUFF FOR SOME AND NOT TO EASY TO MASTER
HUH, SHITVENT?

 
At 5:51 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

,YEAH LITEN UP!(YOU REALLY DO HAVE REAL PROBLEMS .)

 
At 2:34 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

what is it about texas producing to many overly assured degenerated momma's boys with attitude.

 
At 2:36 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

thats too many for you GW/MATT.

 
At 10:27 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

philosophy is a rhetorical device.

 
At 12:25 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

If you think Socrates was a douche bag, you might like Nietzche. He basically thought the same things you did abour Socrates. And yes, all Socrates did was get off annoying the hell out of people.

 
At 6:58 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm glad everyone isn't as ignorant and lazy as you are! Actually you would be an excellent philosopher. I know it sucks to read ancient texts, I dont like to either, but if you hash through it there are things to learn. Universities and colleges are on the cutting edge of education and learning and these texts wouldn't still be studied if they had no salient point. At any rate, Richard Rorty is in total agreement with you on focusing on relevant things, not loftly metaphysics. He is very easy to read since your such a lazy pussy with such a short MTV attention span... Improve your intelect while your in school!!! Don't repress it by being your same ignorant self.

 
At 7:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Fag!

 
At 4:20 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

right on dude i googled philosophy is stupid because my teacher talked about is rhode island and road or an island for an hour and 15 mins like yesturday it was the most boring fuckin class ever...then when i give a possible answer she gives me like a B and i write A papers...philosophy is for fukin crazy ass christian people who think they know it all and want to preach to other people. Why don't philosophers just get a life and live the way they want to,,i don't give a fuck how anybody else lives as long as it dosen't bother me...my philosophy is live the way you want but be smart about it...fuck philosophy and everybody that likes it screw yall!!!!! texas bitch!!!!

 
At 2:36 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think you are just too stupid to realize that you are become quite a philosopher yourself. Philosophy is simply having ideas about a particular topic then studying these ideas.

"Philosophy: The rational investigation of questions about existence and knowledge and ethics." - Websters Dictionary

 
At 8:05 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Piece of shit topic.

They oughta ban philosophy from education. My teacher is miserable, the coursework is miserable, the class is just miserable.

 
At 7:48 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

fuck philosophy

 
At 9:39 AM, Anonymous jazminne said...

i totally agree!

 
At 3:26 PM, Blogger Justin said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

 
At 6:21 PM, Anonymous socrate's taint said...

Philosophy can suck a big fat dick. Today in class the professor started talking about "What is the table? Well, the table is a thing, constructed by a machine, and we use it to put things on. But is it really there? Are you folks in the room really here? I mean I see you but are you really there? It could be a dream!"

Wow. People actually make it their life's ambition to study this horseshit?

Descartes should have philosophized why aids wasn't around yet. Then maybe it could have materialized in Kant's ballbag so that he could drink from his mule and both of them would have died from pneumonia before they got a chance to write any of this nonsense.

News flash philosophers! The chair is real - see: science

IF YOU'RE A PHILOSOPHER OR WANT TO BE ONE, FUCK YOU JIZZBUCKET! FUCK PHILOSOPHY! AND FUCK TEXAS TOO!

 
At 4:38 PM, Blogger WEST BEND CITIZENS FOR SAFE LIBRARIES said...

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At 4:38 PM, Blogger WEST BEND CITIZENS FOR SAFE LIBRARIES said...

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At 1:24 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I took intro to philosophy two times for one of my perquisite for a degree in physics but I could never get an A on my papers. the proff would always give us a question ex. "what is the meaning of life?" I would answer the question with my best possible answer, wrote 5 pages on that question, and received a D. I Mean he told us to write a paper on what we think the answer is, which in other words, our opinion, but he would all ways write a comment on my paper saying
{exact words on that paper}
"I don't think Socrates would agree on that""but thank you for attempting"

I respect all my professors, and I don't want to bo mean but if they want us to write a paper on kissing ass to Socrates and write a paper on how their ideas and how they are correct and always are correct they should say so, and not ask us to write a paper on what we believe the answer is.

thanks to this class that I had to take twice just to get a low C, my transcript doesnt look so attractive anymore.

 
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At 1:57 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

If Philosophy is so stupid how about you try reading Plato, Aristotle, Hericlitus, and other philosophers and try to understand their Philosophy in depth. The most educated professors today still find ancient works mind boggling at how much they knew for their time.

 
At 2:19 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

philosophy is love of asking questions that will make u an asshole. so stay away from it if u want to b normal.

 
At 2:01 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think Philosophy is very interesting and very important. But you are right it is as stupid as hell. It is absurd because it seems to be a 5 year-old girl annoying question thing. Utilitarianism, which sounds great to me is destroyed because it has to be so damn absolute. The world we live in is very screwed up and if rational people could have actual debates without all of the absurd, but what ifs, progress might be made. Abortion is wrong. Should it be illegal? No. It would not be seen as ok to do away with all birth control and use only abortion as birth control. But in essence that is the debate that needs to take place. Using abortion as birth control is wrong. We have tons of methods of birth control and even the day-after pills. Pro choice argues that the state cannot make decisions about what goes on inside of a woman’s body. But they are missing the point entirely.

 
At 5:38 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

oh man, you're so right. I can't get over how utterly worthless philosophers are to humanity. it's undeniable that plato and aristotle were smart guys, since they contributed to science and medicine and things, but they wasted so much time on this, as you put it, horseshit, that you wonder what other actually useful information we may have today if these losers weren't spending days on end arriving at the conclusion that they exist. fellas, if you're asking yourself that question, the answer's probably yes.

 
At 4:38 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

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At 11:10 PM, Blogger Brando McGregor said...

I think you're misunderstanding Socrates. What he was essentially saying was that the way we approach logic and reason is flawed. There are truths. Emotional ones that human being value but cannot reconcile with our logical selves.

Only when our idealism is allowed to flow freely, our spirituality, our faith, and we marry that with our reasoning do we become a whole person.

We are all two people. The logical person. And the idealistic person. He wasn't trying to make people angry he was merely showing that the way we interpet things logically has it's limits. You can always ask a why why why question forever and ever. Logic is flawed. You become a happier person when you stop trying to always find the answers to something and instead embrace the irrational.

 
At 10:46 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thank you so much for posting this blog. I just got done with my Intro to Ancient Philosophy class and I hated (almost) every minute of it. The parts where Socrates and Sextus were like, "hey world, do you realize you have no idea what you're talking about?" -- that was pretty good. But then Socrates starts going off in the Republic about all this shit he never defines.

For everyone on here who's defending philosophy: go back through ANY philosophical work and try to OBJECTIVELY and SCIENTIFICALLY define what they're talking about. Doesn't work. Want to know why? THEY WEREN'T TALKING ABOUT ANYTHING.

The truth is, all these guys' arguments relied on vocabulary that is subjective and is defined differently by each person. On top of that, often times they present metaphors as evidence, and therefore proof (see Socrates' argument that in the same way clothes are dyed, our minds are "dyed" with personality that it can't get rid of).

Tell me what a personality is. Go ahead and do it. If you can completely and specifically define what a personality is in such a way that nobody can rationally deny it, you are the creator of the universe, because man's been trying to do it for centuries and so far nobody's come close.

Also, my Philosophy professor was really bad about grades too. I tried to put my own interpretation into the paper, but he gave me arbitrarily average and low grades until I started vomiting up everything the text said onto the page. Then I got A's.

 
At 8:12 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

You've missed the point fuckface.

 
At 4:33 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I love the article! Right on! Philosophy is stupid!
- It doesn't answer any of the questions
- It doesn't help to resolve any issues
- It won't help me to succeed in my life
- I can't believe people talk about something so obvious and sooo stupid in circles
- and I can't believe I pay so much for these classes either!!!!

Why would you cite ancient "philosophers" if there are so many more interesting and smart people you can cite, talk about and learn from?

I absolutely agree with the author - "If you're going to think that hard about something, make yourself useful and go cure something."
Also, great writing! :)

 
At 4:39 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh, and one more thing: Aristotle says that if you don't know the answer you need to ask a person with practical wisdom... Duh! Wow, what a smart statement! Is it really the best thing the grad school can teach you? ...

 
At 5:37 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

philosophy is funny i dont really care for it but still people get so worked up about question that lead many philosophers to ther death (suicide). I'm only learning philosophy and really sleeping through lessons is the only logical thing there is to do except try to get your head around one of those life-long enigmas no-one's solved for a thousand years.

 
At 7:50 PM, Blogger jimmy said...

You are a 100% retard

 
At 11:18 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

trololol

 
At 7:15 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

This person's idealized Socrates would run around asking everyone, "What's the answer?" These students want the answer so they can repeat it and get an A for repeating it. It's the "Are-we-there-yet?" generation. They seek the quickest way out. You don't have to go to college.

I have students who come into class unable to ask or answer any questions. I have to give them the answers in class or they are completely stuck. Intellectual autonomy died most ungracefully sometime a few years after the transistor was invented. They don't understand the transactional nature of questions. They place highest value in the answers, not on intellectual tools or wisdom. They just want to poke an answer into the right slot so they can forget the useless trivia.

 
At 5:28 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I DON'T AGREE WITH YOU AND I AM SHOUTING. FUCK YOU.

 
At 2:12 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

you speak the truth!!! philosophy is literally the death of me.... i am a nursing student with and have received all A's in all of my nursing classes... i currently have a C in this class... it's fucking retarded

 
At 11:59 AM, Blogger Vegatroll said...

Posting a philosophic text about the value of philosophy. Way to go, candyass.

 
At 12:10 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

what is truth, anyways?

 
At 12:12 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I am a professor at Oxford, and I recently read an ancient text that described Socrates having relations with a mule. It is not certain what kind of "relations" they were, but I have my suspicions. According to the text, he then asked, "Why?"

 
At 10:10 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

LEAVE THE GUY ALONE! He's right philosophy is fucken stupid! I completely agree with the guy. It's just a bunch of idiots going around contradicting themselves and what not.

 
At 12:00 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Es VERDAD! Empty ambiguity well spoken impresses small minds. Subscribing to it empowers them.

 
At 8:51 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Philosophy is not stupid at all. It's not for everyone, although intellectual curiosity should be. If your goal in life is simply to plug along, get some business degree and work some arbitrary job, then philosophy isn't for you. It's not the answers that are the point of philosophy, it's the questions that it asks. Philosophy teaches you how to argue and use logic to communicate your ideas clearly. I can assure you that your Ph.D holding professor is smarter than you will ever be, and contrary to popular belief, philosophy is not just your opinion.

 
At 8:41 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Kripke said it best

“The idea that philosophy should be relevant to life is a modern idea. A lot of philosophy does not have relevance to life...”

and also again

"The intention of philosophy was never to be relevant to life."

if you are to much of a sheep to comprehend -- then please shut up about what you don't understand.

 
At 10:38 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Aye, true enough...philosophy is rather pointless and time-wasting.
The total summary of it could be taught in a couple of hours, and it would only serve us to understand a few of the principles that rule the "principle" behind some laws of western civilization as we know it. The absolute truth is that ever since the begining of time Human kind has done what it needed to survive, and the course of human History was very seldom changed or influenced -(if ever)- by that which consists of "philosophy" as it is taught in classrooms. The purpose of philosophy today is to provide imbeciles whom couldn't even hit then toilet sitting down with a college degree and a license to be smug, because the state provideds them with a comfy "job". I'd put 97% of today's philosophy teachers planting spuds orm digging ditches...there would be plenty of fresh air and exercise to ponder upon...I am from Portugal, in my country 97% of philosophy teachers are halfwitts with a grin on their faces and air of self-importance.

 
At 4:05 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Very true. I philosophized about everything for about 3 months straight and finally realized my stupidity when I listened to the recording of my last conversation with someone who I thought was my friend. Although it's a great way to come up with many quotes.....

 
At 6:27 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ah, shut the fuck up. You clearly didn't understand what's the purpose of philosophy. If you did, you wouldn't have wasted your time writing this shit. You must be some arrogant 16 year old.

 
At 11:22 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Philosophy is indeed the pointless babble of those who want to make people think they are having analytical thoughts when they actually they aren't able to analyze at all, and the conclusions, if any, that they come to are those everyone already knows, or they are plainly false, or obviously wrong delusions of the masses, but I have to say that connecting all this somehow to gays is so stupid it is almost fascinating. If my getting off on tight anal penetration of a (partially) willing young man of legal age hurts your feelings as a man, then you aren't a man, you're a squeamish weakling in denial, and you need to get your life together, you're obviously falling apart inside, and being a follower of religious philosophy, you have no room to criticize any philosopher, at least they knew they were full of it. Please try to get laid, even if it has to be with a fat girl, so you stop focusing on my sex life, you self-emasculating losers. I'm just so tired of listening to you whine about how my jizzing in cute guy's mouths in private upsets you in public, you crybaby retards, please kill yourselves if you can't satisfy yourself sexually, it will be so much better for the rest of mankind, and THAT is no philosophy, it's just a fact.

 
At 1:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I agree with your post. "Philosophy" may have been of use in ancient times to make people think, but it was rendered archaic and useless when the scientific method came around. Now it's just the theoretical ramblings of dead people. It can and has been used to justify anything and everything from communism to nazism. Many of the so-called 'enlightenment' philosophers quoted today were the same ones Hitler read.
I'm taking a Philosophy exam this week and have wasted the past three nights of my life preparing for it. Holy shit, what a bunch of useless crap! I don't think I can take another minute of reading all the things these bastards pulled out their asses. It's basically just a bunch of ambiguous shit-talking by old men who never did a goddamned thing! The argument and rhetoric side of philosophy is successfully taught in a COMS class, there's no need to force us to memorize countless wrong ambiguous factoids in intense detail (so and so thought everything comes from water - BUT so and so though everything came from fire! ect.) What bothers me the most is my professor repeatedly says, "Oh we only have fragments of what this person wrote so most of what we know is hearsay." Really? In what other discipline is this acceptable?

 
At 1:08 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Philosophy is not a quest for knowledge. Philosophy is on a quest for its own relevance. “Philosophy is dead.”- Stephen Hawking.

 
At 6:23 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wouldn't it depend on what your pondering? Could you come up with a hypothesis without philosophy? Wouldn't you want to link it with other fields as well, no use only pondering things if you have no understanding of them. Meaning of existence? Shut up and be grateful.

 
At 2:23 PM, Anonymous pmoseman said...

Philosophic words like "our logical selves" are merely ornamental and useless buzz-words. There is a self and there is logic, their is no illogical self and logical self, they are both just the self.
Philosophers talk about "ordinary men" and I consider myself an ordinary man and at my education level and age I should be able to understand someone who knows what they are talking about.
For a statement to be true, you must understand how it can be misunderstood. If you provide a philosophy no one understands then it is not they who fail; it is your philosophy.

 
At 3:40 AM, Blogger daniel plotter said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

 
At 3:40 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

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At 3:51 AM, Anonymous Arbeiten und Herstellen stellen für Arendt Antworten des Menschen auf seine Sterblichkeit dar: Das Arbeiten sichert das Überleben des Individuums und das Weiterleben der Gattung, und das Herstellen schafft eine künstliche Welt, die dem vergänglichen Dasein ihrer Bewohner bis zu einem gewissen Grade Bestand und Dauer verleiht. Das Handeln wiederum, als menschlichste der drei genannten Tätigkeiten bestimmt, steht in enger Beziehung zur Tatsache des Geborenseins, wie Arendt in ihrem Essay Macht und Gewalt ausführt. said...

Arbeiten und Herstellen stellen für Arendt Antworten des Menschen auf seine Sterblichkeit dar: Das Arbeiten sichert das Überleben des Individuums und das Weiterleben der Gattung, und das Herstellen schafft eine künstliche Welt, die dem vergänglichen Dasein ihrer Bewohner bis zu einem gewissen Grade Bestand und Dauer verleiht. Das Handeln wiederum, als menschlichste der drei genannten Tätigkeiten bestimmt, steht in enger Beziehung zur Tatsache des Geborenseins, wie Arendt in ihrem Essay Macht und Gewalt ausführt.

 
At 5:24 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm gonna correct your title, "Learning Philosophy in a University is Stupid" why? because it's not taught in a fun way, they have you read dialogues that can easily be summarized and made simple to read, have you in a room with a professor whose already made up their minds about what constitutes truth, and the most unfortunate part is that they make the class impossible. Try philosophy again on your own time and you might have better results. Watching a documentary about each person taught me way more than the school. I also took a classic greek philosophy class and hated it for all the same reasons. Socrates was my favorite philosopher though because he believed in questioning to find truth. You're totally right, most the time he never found answers, but at least he could prove that the answers held at the time had inaccuracies. that's reasonably valuable right? If notions aren't scrutinized like that people can end up living like sheep. I believe all Philosophy after Socrates and parts of stoicism (xeno) became more opinionated and more "full of crap" because they make more assumptions and take more for granted. Socrates took nothing for granted, and its only from there you can start. This is important because influential groups like the political media and big business force opinions on us that aren't valid. The only way to know how to stick up for our opinions is to question the current opinions, find faults in them, and let those faults be known in hopes that a better opinion can be made. It's unfortunate that the pratical use of philosophy isn't taught at universities because pompous philosophy doctorates think that the "classical" way of teaching philosophy is the only correct way. Doccumentaries, books, and sensible people though know that 80% of what a philosopher says can be condensed onto a single page and made easy to understand. I hope this changes your opinion slightly, and hopefully makes you feel like you didnt waste all your time and money in that place. Philosophy is cool, but not in the awful environment of the classroom. Socrates never taught it like that.

 
At 9:17 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Took philosophy 101 to give me some insight in life, expand my horizons, etc.

EVERY. FUCKING. CLASS. WAS A GOD DAMN CIRCLE JERK ON SOCRATES AND PLATO. Dumb-ass wrinkled vanilla beans asked a bunch of questions to which the answers:

a) does not exist
b) would be of no significance by existing

Fair enough, maybe I just don't understand it yet. I mean, I socialize with people, exercise daily, read something like 35 books per year on top of academics, and have a near perfect GPA, but I must be god damn stupid. Because when the prof asked us to write a paper on the purpose of life in my own opinion, I hilariously thought he had meant that we should write a paper on the purpose of life, IN MY OWN GOD DAMN OPINION. WOOPSIEDAISY!!

Hand in paper with perfect diction, grammar, all that jazz, complete with original insight and ideas backed with everyday observations and some anecdotes. Get paper back "lolol that's not that Socrates said, yeah when I said 'in your own opinion' I actually meant 'regurgitate everything some faggot who died thousands of years ago MIGHT have meant. Enjoy your failing grade."

Fine. FINE. Shat out wikipedia and fanboy cum from there after, Solid 'A's.

There is no meaning to life. Life is merely a condition that which can be perpetuated by having children. PERIOD.

Think whatever the hell you want, live however the hell you want, but there is, and only ever will be, one so called 'universal truth': you gonna die.

Why the fuck do you got to go wasting your precious years to never find an answer to a question that doesn't even fucking exist? Just enjoy life man, do what makes you happy, this, btw, means NOT TAKING PHILOSOPHY.

Fuck that course. Fuck this fanclub.

 

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